[ The realization comes quick, dawning on his face and twisting it into something rarely seen─ shock, uncertainty, and lingering disbelief. He witnessed her death, they all had, hopeless to stop it from happening, and yet here she stands. Alive and well.
How? The question echoes in his head, loud and unyielding, and he realizes all at once where they stand and how it must look. His body tenses, hand curling tighter around the bouquet he had intended to leave for her. The companion they had lost in their struggle, but they did not actually lose her it seems. That knowledge alone sits uncomfortably upon Estinien's shoulders, sets his jaw tightly as he wrestles with all that spins in his head. ]
We watched you fall. [ He starts, looking to the sky then to the flowers in his hand. ] Either we were too hasty to presume your demise, or my mind is truly lost to me now.
[ In the back of his mind he hears Aymeric's disapproval, his worrying concern for his dear friend's health. Perhaps he should have rested more, despite his many valid grievances with the concept, if he is dreaming up the return of Ysayle in his waking hours.
The dragoon exhales, annoyed at himself more than her, holding the flowers out towards her. ]
Take them, then, if you truly breathe. If you do not, I ask you leave me be.
( Ysayle is not a woman of comfort, and as such has no words for the dragoon that might ease the realization that is dawning on him. Even if she had, she knows him well enough to spare him it; at worst he would take it as pity, at best: as unnecessary. )
I fell, that much is true. T'was not my intention to live, dragoon, yet here I am.
( She looks at him then, eyes sharp and holding his gaze for however long he will allow it. And then she reaches for the flowers -- lilies -- her cold fingers brushing over his to offer him proof of her continued existence. They're beautiful, if a simple gesture, and she tucks them into the crook of her arm to keep them safe from the tempestuous wind that tears at them.
A fine gesture. She was not lying when she told him it was appreciated. Only it was never meant to be something for her to weigh in on, and Iceheart can only imagine how much more his thoughts will churn at this proof of her continued existence. )
How I came to survive I know not. Hydaelyn herself, perhaps, or an act of mercy by Hraesvelgr. But Vidofnir saw to my recovery as best she could, and then I rested at Tailfeather. ( Before Nidhogg attempted to take Vidofnir's life -- it was familiar, being surrounded by dragons and trying to find her new path. She is grateful for it, even if she still has not found it. ) It was the Lord Commander himself who told me you were free of Nidhogg and that you sought to travel here, although I hear tell he has a new title now.
[ It is the moment her fingers brush over his own that the realization fully dawns, doubt slipping from his mind like water from a duck's back. He does not know how to react if he ought to be visibly relieved, or bury such things deep down as he always does. He has never been an emotional man, save for anger and the lust for revenge, and thus does Estinien find himself at a loss.
He is relieved, gladdened that she breathes and that his mind is still his own, and yet he knows not how to express it. Arms crossed across his chest, he looks back at the sky before returning his attention to her, expression unchanged despite the storm churning in his head. ]
Aymeric? [ Estinien frowns, annoyance quick to flare up. Of course, he knew, of course he sought her out knowing full well what Estinien intended to do rather than rest. He has to wonder if he told her everything if Vidofnir told her of Nidhogg's grip on his mind.
Of his weakness.
Estinien exhales heavily, turning his head from her. ] He knows me better than myself, it seems. Not content to leave me to my own devices, he sends you to ensure I have not thrown myself from a cliffside.
( They are both lost here, for Ysayle has no real idea how to move forward. What does one do now that their entire reason for existing is at an end? What does one do in peace, beyond live it? Lady Iceheart was meant to usher it in for others -- now that it's done, what now?
She was not so desperate to throw herself off into the sky again, but she cannot say she doesn't understand the urge. )
If that were his true intentions, he would have had better luck sending the Warrior of Light. ( Previous interactions between the two of them had just ended in bickering, after all. Ysayle doubts very much that she could stop Estinien from doing whatever foolish notion came into his head if he was set upon it. ) Nay, my reasons for coming were my own.
( To see him as well as one can, with her own eyes. Even know Ysayle knows she cannot easily distance herself from those who she had... grown close to, during their short time together. If the Warrior of Light were to call her into service, she thinks she would gladly go without question. )
[ Estinien does not laugh, the sound is more of an amused snort than anything else, lips curved up into a wry smirk. She has a point if Aymeric were to send someone after him he would enlist the aid of the Warrior of Light, perhaps even give chase himself if the situation was pressing enough. The thought of both his friend chasing after him fills the dragoon with a brief sense of joy and relief.
Truly he is gladdened by the fact it is Ysayle who followed after him. ]
Did you worry for me Lady Iceheart? [ He glances over at her. ] I was not aware that our travels granted me the gift of your concern.
[ A part of him flinches at the sharpness of his own voice, not how he intended to sound in truth but how he speaks regardless. How else is he to react to such knowledge? To think the woman he bickered with, clashed with, would grow concerned for him is... well, he struggles to come to grips with it.
Estinien exhales before she has the time to respond, in a vain hope to soften his own words, shifting his weight: ] I thank you for it, if that is the case.
( So what if she does? Ysayle might be loathe to admit it to herself, let alone tell him so, but there is a fondness in her heart for those she's traveled with -- a connection that she is reluctant, if not unwilling, to break. Staring out at the tempestuous skies in a moment of silence gives her no clarity, no answers as to what her future entails, but knowing that there are those with whom she has formed a bond with gives her no small amount of strength. She will find whatever it is, and she need not do it alone.
Ysayle moves to stand next to him, a respectable distance between them, but a sign of solidarity. )
Mayhaps. ( A pause, and her eyes flick to him once more, still unsure of what to make of the man beneath the armor. ) 'Tis my belief that we are not opposites, and therefore doomed to clash, but mirrors. Now more than ever, though the cost was dearer to you than I. My concern is--
( A pause, and for once she fumbles with her words just as he does, taking care to pick the right ones, and feeling as if she is falling short. Her gaze falls from his face, back to the bouquet in her arms. It almost feels too sentimental, too attached, and part of her is scared at the idea that she might lose those she cares for as she once did. Not through snow and ice but through the nature of the people they are.
Ysayle swallows, pushes past the ice she has built up around herself. Just as Estinien's words will always have an edge, her's are cold in spite of herself. )
I am glad to see you whole and hale, dragoon. T'would not do for one of us to live while the other does not.
[ Mirrors, she says, and the hint of a smile finds his face. Once he would have balked at her words, claimed they were nothing of the sort, but now he does not dare for there is truth in her words that cannot be denied. It is almost funny how it took nearly losing everything he had to see the errors of his ways.
He looks from her to the sky once more, uncrossing his arms before turning to face her. He had not planned to linger here long, intent to travel further before deciding on what his next step. Ysayle's return, learning of her survival, has not changed his intentions and yet he finds himself unable to simply leave as he would any other. ]
Thank you, Ysayle. [ It almost sounds strange hearing her name come from his own mouth. ] In truth it has gladdened me to see you survived despite all odds. We lost too many throughout the course of the Dragonsong War, friends and allies, to have one less to mourn is a relief.
[ He breathes out, mouth twitching into an almost wider smile. ]
Alphinaud will be glad to hear of it, and I shall be glad to hear an end of his weeping.
[ It is sad with more fondness than an edge, memories taking him back to waking on his sickbed and boy beside him, eyes filled to the brim with tears threatening to fall. If anything he is glad for Alphinaud the most. ]
I make for Sohr Khai next, to honor Ratatoskr and make amends for my and my ancestor's roles in the war. [ He feels no need to obscure his intentions to her, feels there is little point to it. ] Would you accompany me?
( If someone had told her if she would find herself standing side by side with the Azure Dragoon as comrades, as friends, only a short while ago, Ysayle would have thought the notion foolish. Time, however, has only taught her that even she can be made a fool of, that the truth is always somewhat more complex, and that allies can be the most unlikely of souls. )
You need not thank me, Estinien. ( There is still much she has to atone for, much she has to work out how to begin to do that, but at least he has not paid the final price for his folly, same as she. In that they are together.
The mention of Alphinaud does pull a smile out of her, thinking fondly of the young man and his intense attachment to those he cared about. He may be young, but Ysayle knows that there is a great future for him, in time. And knows that Estinien feels likewise. ) Are you not fearful that upon spying both of us he might begin anew?
( There is an honesty between them now that Ysayle does not think she could explain -- to lie to Estinien would serve no point; he has seen her at her worse, seen her take lives in the name of her cause, and yet sought to honor her memory all the same. Strange how fate takes her in places she never thought to be.
He speaks of making amends to the dragons, to honoring Ratatoskr, and there is nothing more she would like to see. To pay her own respects for what she has done in the name of misguided justice, to forge a new path forward. ) I would like nothing more. Vidofnir will carry me to Sohr Khai, and you as well if you have need of it.
( Presumably he has his own means of transportation, but knowing of Estinien's last encounter with the dragon there may be some benefit in seeing that she is both recovered and free of ill-will towards him. After all, it was Nidhogg that struck the blow, not Estinien. )
[ He does, he must, for his interactions with her and their travel together did more than he can word. She had played a large part in his change, there is no way he can ignore it nor the gift of her concern. Regardless he chooses not to correct her, offering the ghost of a smile, an expression he is still not wholly used to. ]
Mayhaps or he will grow angry for my leaving without saying farewell. [ Which is why he chose to steal away like a thief, the image of the boy's refusal to let him leave alongside the Warrior of Light and Aymeric was... well he didn't wish to face such insurmountable odds. ] Best to avoid him for now while some layer of peace still rests upon us.
[ Gladden he is for agreeing to his request but the mention of Vidofnir causes Estinien's body to tense, gaze glancing behind them as if to spy the dragon in question. He remembers all too clearly the day Nidhogg forced his body to injury her gravely, remembers holding his lance tightly between his hands as he proclaimed the final verse. Remembers all too clearly Aymeric's tight expression, his aim so true the arrow might have felled him then were it not for there wyrm's power. ]
Aymeric told me the blow did not fell her. [ He shifts arms crossing across his chest. ] Though it has not been long since I was under the wyrm's spell, I would not blame her if she harbored a grudge.
[ What little he knows of Vidofnir tells him that she may not, that she may have forgiven him for the deeds done without his consent. Even so, he has no wish to bring up painful memories. ]
( Ysayle wished she had been there, that her own recovery had not kept her far away from seeing the pieces of her dream start being laid. But it isn't just her's now, it's all of Ishgard's. Of Aymeric and the Warrior of Light, of Alphinaud, too. There is the swelling feeling of pride within her chest -- not for her accomplishments, but for their's. )
No doubt he shall find his way to us e're long, if he has need of our talents. But know if I am there to witness it I shan't be moved to intervene on your behalf -- it will be a well deserved lecture.
( There is a trace of humor there, somewhere. )
Aye, she recovered well under the care of her kin. ( That Estinien would not let himself off so easily for Nidhogg's actions does not surprise her; they all have their ghosts that haunt them. Even now Ysayle does not know the nature of the creature in her soul, nor can she forgive herself for those who have suffered for her misguided crusade. Still-- ) She knows that you were not yourself. 'Tis grudges and old hurts that moved Nidhogg's hand -- neither dragon nor Ishgardian can move forward if we cling to them.
( Vidofnir knows that well, too. Still -- she will not force Estinien to do something he may not wish to do; Ysayle doubts she could anyway, as stubborn as he might be. )
[ But he is not good at farewells, thus his leaving without a word, something Aymeric knows full well but the boy less so. A part of him feels guilt for it, but it is easily drowned out by the rest─ Alphinuad is a man grown, his feelings should not be so hurt from a missing farewell.
Ah, but thoughts of the boy are far from his mind at this moment, gaze focused on Ysayle as she speaks of Vidnofnnir's recovery. As she speaks the tension seems to seep from his posture, shoulders relaxing as he lets go of a breath he had not wholly aware of holding. Once again Lady Iceheart speaks with a wisdom that is beyond his grasp, schooling the thoughts that flick about his mind. ]
Then I will be honored to have her carry me to Sohr Kai as well.
( A small incline of her head; she gestures him forward with her free hand -- the other still holding the flowers. It seems silly and pointless to keep holding them, but they were meant for her. Simply because she is alive doesn't change that.
If he follows, Ysayle leads him to Vidofnir -- waiting for the both of them some distance away. Her gaze is wary towards Estinien, but absence of hostility. That she cannot fault the dragon for -- the Azure Dragoon even without his armor and the Eye is still a man who has slain many of her kind. But they are working towards a peace, and Ysayle takes a few steps forward. )
Estinien Wyrmblood accepts your offer to fly him to Sohr Kai. ( Not 'dragoon', not 'the Azure Dragoon'. Ysayle knows not of what he plans to do now; is he as lost as she? But he is none of those things in this moment, not to her, and neither should he be them to Vidofnir. ) We go to pay our respects to Ratatoskr.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
dragonsung) wrote2020-07-17 06:13 pm
no subject
How? The question echoes in his head, loud and unyielding, and he realizes all at once where they stand and how it must look. His body tenses, hand curling tighter around the bouquet he had intended to leave for her. The companion they had lost in their struggle, but they did not actually lose her it seems. That knowledge alone sits uncomfortably upon Estinien's shoulders, sets his jaw tightly as he wrestles with all that spins in his head. ]
We watched you fall. [ He starts, looking to the sky then to the flowers in his hand. ] Either we were too hasty to presume your demise, or my mind is truly lost to me now.
[ In the back of his mind he hears Aymeric's disapproval, his worrying concern for his dear friend's health. Perhaps he should have rested more, despite his many valid grievances with the concept, if he is dreaming up the return of Ysayle in his waking hours.
The dragoon exhales, annoyed at himself more than her, holding the flowers out towards her. ]
Take them, then, if you truly breathe. If you do not, I ask you leave me be.
no subject
I fell, that much is true. T'was not my intention to live, dragoon, yet here I am.
( She looks at him then, eyes sharp and holding his gaze for however long he will allow it. And then she reaches for the flowers -- lilies -- her cold fingers brushing over his to offer him proof of her continued existence. They're beautiful, if a simple gesture, and she tucks them into the crook of her arm to keep them safe from the tempestuous wind that tears at them.
A fine gesture. She was not lying when she told him it was appreciated. Only it was never meant to be something for her to weigh in on, and Iceheart can only imagine how much more his thoughts will churn at this proof of her continued existence. )
How I came to survive I know not. Hydaelyn herself, perhaps, or an act of mercy by Hraesvelgr. But Vidofnir saw to my recovery as best she could, and then I rested at Tailfeather. ( Before Nidhogg attempted to take Vidofnir's life -- it was familiar, being surrounded by dragons and trying to find her new path. She is grateful for it, even if she still has not found it. ) It was the Lord Commander himself who told me you were free of Nidhogg and that you sought to travel here, although I hear tell he has a new title now.
no subject
He is relieved, gladdened that she breathes and that his mind is still his own, and yet he knows not how to express it. Arms crossed across his chest, he looks back at the sky before returning his attention to her, expression unchanged despite the storm churning in his head. ]
Aymeric? [ Estinien frowns, annoyance quick to flare up. Of course, he knew, of course he sought her out knowing full well what Estinien intended to do rather than rest. He has to wonder if he told her everything if Vidofnir told her of Nidhogg's grip on his mind.
Of his weakness.
Estinien exhales heavily, turning his head from her. ] He knows me better than myself, it seems. Not content to leave me to my own devices, he sends you to ensure I have not thrown myself from a cliffside.
no subject
She was not so desperate to throw herself off into the sky again, but she cannot say she doesn't understand the urge. )
If that were his true intentions, he would have had better luck sending the Warrior of Light. ( Previous interactions between the two of them had just ended in bickering, after all. Ysayle doubts very much that she could stop Estinien from doing whatever foolish notion came into his head if he was set upon it. ) Nay, my reasons for coming were my own.
( To see him as well as one can, with her own eyes. Even know Ysayle knows she cannot easily distance herself from those who she had... grown close to, during their short time together. If the Warrior of Light were to call her into service, she thinks she would gladly go without question. )
no subject
Truly he is gladdened by the fact it is Ysayle who followed after him. ]
Did you worry for me Lady Iceheart? [ He glances over at her. ] I was not aware that our travels granted me the gift of your concern.
[ A part of him flinches at the sharpness of his own voice, not how he intended to sound in truth but how he speaks regardless. How else is he to react to such knowledge? To think the woman he bickered with, clashed with, would grow concerned for him is... well, he struggles to come to grips with it.
Estinien exhales before she has the time to respond, in a vain hope to soften his own words, shifting his weight: ] I thank you for it, if that is the case.
no subject
Ysayle moves to stand next to him, a respectable distance between them, but a sign of solidarity. )
Mayhaps. ( A pause, and her eyes flick to him once more, still unsure of what to make of the man beneath the armor. ) 'Tis my belief that we are not opposites, and therefore doomed to clash, but mirrors. Now more than ever, though the cost was dearer to you than I. My concern is--
( A pause, and for once she fumbles with her words just as he does, taking care to pick the right ones, and feeling as if she is falling short. Her gaze falls from his face, back to the bouquet in her arms. It almost feels too sentimental, too attached, and part of her is scared at the idea that she might lose those she cares for as she once did. Not through snow and ice but through the nature of the people they are.
Ysayle swallows, pushes past the ice she has built up around herself. Just as Estinien's words will always have an edge, her's are cold in spite of herself. )
I am glad to see you whole and hale, dragoon. T'would not do for one of us to live while the other does not.
no subject
He looks from her to the sky once more, uncrossing his arms before turning to face her. He had not planned to linger here long, intent to travel further before deciding on what his next step. Ysayle's return, learning of her survival, has not changed his intentions and yet he finds himself unable to simply leave as he would any other. ]
Thank you, Ysayle. [ It almost sounds strange hearing her name come from his own mouth. ] In truth it has gladdened me to see you survived despite all odds. We lost too many throughout the course of the Dragonsong War, friends and allies, to have one less to mourn is a relief.
[ He breathes out, mouth twitching into an almost wider smile. ]
Alphinaud will be glad to hear of it, and I shall be glad to hear an end of his weeping.
[ It is sad with more fondness than an edge, memories taking him back to waking on his sickbed and boy beside him, eyes filled to the brim with tears threatening to fall. If anything he is glad for Alphinaud the most. ]
I make for Sohr Khai next, to honor Ratatoskr and make amends for my and my ancestor's roles in the war. [ He feels no need to obscure his intentions to her, feels there is little point to it. ] Would you accompany me?
no subject
You need not thank me, Estinien. ( There is still much she has to atone for, much she has to work out how to begin to do that, but at least he has not paid the final price for his folly, same as she. In that they are together.
The mention of Alphinaud does pull a smile out of her, thinking fondly of the young man and his intense attachment to those he cared about. He may be young, but Ysayle knows that there is a great future for him, in time. And knows that Estinien feels likewise. ) Are you not fearful that upon spying both of us he might begin anew?
( There is an honesty between them now that Ysayle does not think she could explain -- to lie to Estinien would serve no point; he has seen her at her worse, seen her take lives in the name of her cause, and yet sought to honor her memory all the same. Strange how fate takes her in places she never thought to be.
He speaks of making amends to the dragons, to honoring Ratatoskr, and there is nothing more she would like to see. To pay her own respects for what she has done in the name of misguided justice, to forge a new path forward. ) I would like nothing more. Vidofnir will carry me to Sohr Khai, and you as well if you have need of it.
( Presumably he has his own means of transportation, but knowing of Estinien's last encounter with the dragon there may be some benefit in seeing that she is both recovered and free of ill-will towards him. After all, it was Nidhogg that struck the blow, not Estinien. )
no subject
Mayhaps or he will grow angry for my leaving without saying farewell. [ Which is why he chose to steal away like a thief, the image of the boy's refusal to let him leave alongside the Warrior of Light and Aymeric was... well he didn't wish to face such insurmountable odds. ] Best to avoid him for now while some layer of peace still rests upon us.
[ Gladden he is for agreeing to his request but the mention of Vidofnir causes Estinien's body to tense, gaze glancing behind them as if to spy the dragon in question. He remembers all too clearly the day Nidhogg forced his body to injury her gravely, remembers holding his lance tightly between his hands as he proclaimed the final verse. Remembers all too clearly Aymeric's tight expression, his aim so true the arrow might have felled him then were it not for there wyrm's power. ]
Aymeric told me the blow did not fell her. [ He shifts arms crossing across his chest. ] Though it has not been long since I was under the wyrm's spell, I would not blame her if she harbored a grudge.
[ What little he knows of Vidofnir tells him that she may not, that she may have forgiven him for the deeds done without his consent. Even so, he has no wish to bring up painful memories. ]
no subject
No doubt he shall find his way to us e're long, if he has need of our talents. But know if I am there to witness it I shan't be moved to intervene on your behalf -- it will be a well deserved lecture.
( There is a trace of humor there, somewhere. )
Aye, she recovered well under the care of her kin. ( That Estinien would not let himself off so easily for Nidhogg's actions does not surprise her; they all have their ghosts that haunt them. Even now Ysayle does not know the nature of the creature in her soul, nor can she forgive herself for those who have suffered for her misguided crusade. Still-- ) She knows that you were not yourself. 'Tis grudges and old hurts that moved Nidhogg's hand -- neither dragon nor Ishgardian can move forward if we cling to them.
( Vidofnir knows that well, too. Still -- she will not force Estinien to do something he may not wish to do; Ysayle doubts she could anyway, as stubborn as he might be. )
no subject
[ But he is not good at farewells, thus his leaving without a word, something Aymeric knows full well but the boy less so. A part of him feels guilt for it, but it is easily drowned out by the rest─ Alphinuad is a man grown, his feelings should not be so hurt from a missing farewell.
Ah, but thoughts of the boy are far from his mind at this moment, gaze focused on Ysayle as she speaks of Vidnofnnir's recovery. As she speaks the tension seems to seep from his posture, shoulders relaxing as he lets go of a breath he had not wholly aware of holding. Once again Lady Iceheart speaks with a wisdom that is beyond his grasp, schooling the thoughts that flick about his mind. ]
Then I will be honored to have her carry me to Sohr Kai as well.
no subject
If he follows, Ysayle leads him to Vidofnir -- waiting for the both of them some distance away. Her gaze is wary towards Estinien, but absence of hostility. That she cannot fault the dragon for -- the Azure Dragoon even without his armor and the Eye is still a man who has slain many of her kind. But they are working towards a peace, and Ysayle takes a few steps forward. )
Estinien Wyrmblood accepts your offer to fly him to Sohr Kai. ( Not 'dragoon', not 'the Azure Dragoon'. Ysayle knows not of what he plans to do now; is he as lost as she? But he is none of those things in this moment, not to her, and neither should he be them to Vidofnir. ) We go to pay our respects to Ratatoskr.